Thursday, May 24, 2007

~I want to be the way I was made~

Made in your image.. Made with your hands. Made to discover who You are and who I am...

I admitted 4 patients this week. Two of them have gallbladder or billiary duct cancer... I again feel as though I’m at the limit of my testing. Like the map of my life has the doppler radar scanning over it with multiple lightening strikes and areas of "red" warnings. I wonder sometimes if I’m not walking around with a message scrolling across the bottom of my page.
I wonder too if I’m being battered so much by this storm because I’m on the outside fringes of His will for my life. If I were pressed in closer to where I’m supposed to be wouldn’t the storm not feel so close. I get the image in my head of His hand stretched out, palm side down.. And me standing under it... The closer I am to the center then the more covering I have. I’m looking around for where & why I’m not in His perfect will for my life. God change me from who I am to what You are!
I know that faith and fear can’t operate in the same being so I’m leaning on what I know to be true. That nothing but the will of God can come for me.

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